…desperate.
Last night, while discussing Isaac’s new sleep troubles with Lorena, I told her, “the good thing is, no matter what, I always know that if I can get through the day, I can count on him going to sleep at night and sleeping through the night”. When he was only a few months old, and he was fighting sleep, there was no guarantee that we would ever have a reprieve. Now, knowing that we’ll get a good 10-11 hours at night, I can keep from having that hopeless desperate feeling.
At precisely 2:04 am, the boy awakened beginning an hour long fight to get back to sleep. As I sat in the rocking chair in the darkness, the hopeless desperate feeling crept back over me.
Will I be up all night?
Will he ever stop trying to climb out of his crib?
Will this be one exception to the rule, or do I need to plan on getting up in the middle of the night from now on?
Why didn’t I go to bed when I got home from tutoring instead of staying up until 11?
Am I spoiling him?
If I let him cry, will I be neglecting him?
If today is like yesterday, look for Isaac to be on ebay by the end of the day.
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I just now realized that I never really detailed what happened yesterday.
Here it is in a nutshell:
Isaac slept a total of 2 hours in the course of 3 naps. And they weren’t naps like they used to be. It takes about 45 minutes for him to go to sleep. At least. I put him down. He cries a little, and then climbs the side of the crib. He gets stuck (because he doesn’t know how to sit back down yet). He screams. I go in and pry his little hands off the railing and lie him back down.
Repeat.
Only with each repeat, he gets more and more frustrated and frantic. Finally, I pick him up to calm him down, change a diaper and try again. In the extreme cases, I hold him down (lightly – as to not alarm social services) until he puts his thumb in his mouth and goes to sleep.
I then run, to complete essential tasks before he awakens 30-40 minutes later and climbs the side of the crib and begins to scream. This time there’s no going back to sleep, so we get up and fight through another awake cycle.
Good times.
Oh, and then there’s the part where he’s so tired and/or he wants to get down and test his new skills, so he won’t sit in his high chair and eat. I’m sure that’s helping how he’s feeling. Tired, hungry, frustrated, and a little (lot) more tired.
So, that is (not in a nutshell after all) what went down yesterday.